Alexa has been more and more interested about learning about her dad. Early on in the journey, I packed up a bin labeled “Alex.” At this point, I wasn’t even really sure what I had put in there. We opened it this weekend. She was excited to see a special rubix cube, origami items he made and put all over her incubator in the hospital, his hat, a blanket made from his shirts, stuffed animals we had gotten each other… She went through and looked at everything. There were items from my wedding, old photos, his baby book… all kinds of random things. Many items, I was ready to allow Alexa to take and do whatever she wanted with them. Some, I still felt needed to be packed away again. I am at a place in life where I do not want my wedding photo displayed. I don’t want reminders of him all over the house. I will not, however, tell her she cannot have these items displayed in her room. That’s her territory and I believe she should be able to memorialize him however she wants there. She doesn’t remember him. But this is a way she can connect, and “know” him. It’s nice to see her happy and excited about it. These items don’t hold sadness or pain for her. She looks so cute in his hat…

 

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